Abdur-Rahman ibn Awf and Sa'd ibn ar-Rabi': The Market, Not the Gift

The Prophet ﷺ paired the Muhājir ʿAbdur-Raḥmān ibn ʿAwf with the Anṣārī Saʿd ibn al-Rabīʿ. Saʿd was known as the wealthiest of the Anṣār, and ʿAbdur-Raḥmān had been one of the wealthiest men in Makkah before the Hijra, a successful merchant who had left everything behind.

Saʿd brought his new brother home. What he offered him has no parallel in recorded history.

"I am the richest of the Anṣār in wealth," he said. "I will give you half of all my money. Take it."

"I have a two-storey house. One floor is yours."

"I have two gardens. One of them is yours."

Then he said something no one had asked of him: "I have two wives. Look at them. Choose whichever one you prefer. After her ʿIddah (the waiting period after divorce) is complete, you may marry her."

He was offering to halve everything, his home, his land, his wealth, his household. Not as a loan. Not with any expectation of return. Simply because this man was now his brother.

❧ʿAbdur-Raḥmān's Response

ʿAbdur-Raḥmān said: "Bārakallāhu laka fī mālik wa ahlik", "May Allāh bless you in your wealth and your family."

And then: "Just show me where the marketplace is."

He took what he had carried on the Hijra, whatever small amount fit in his possession, went to the market of the Jews outside Madinah, bought and sold a little, came back with some butter and some wheat. The next day he took that and traded again. And again. And kept going.

This was not ingratitude. This was ʿizzah, self-respect and dignity. ʿAbdur-Raḥmān understood that accepting a free house, free money, and the hand of someone else's wife would create an imbalance, a debt that, even if never spoken, would hang in the air between them. He did not want that. He wanted to earn, to build, and to stand on his own feet.

There is also the long-term wisdom: even if Saʿd's own heart was pure and generous, what about future generations? What about those who did not share Saʿd's character? A free gift of land and wealth could eventually be thrown in someone's face. The Prophet ﷺ himself had declined the Anṣārī offer to give half of Madinah's date palms to the Muhājirūn for the same reason, he wanted the Muhājirūn to work for what they received.

❧The Day the Prophet Noticed

Some time later, the precise interval is not specified, but enough time had passed, the Prophet ﷺ saw ʿAbdur-Raḥmān ibn ʿAwf. He was dressed well, with perfume on.

The Prophet ﷺ smiled and joked with him: "Māhādha?", "What is this?" Or in some narrations: "Tazawwajt?", "Have you gotten married?"

ʿAbdur-Raḥmān said: "Yes, O Messenger of Allāh, I got married."

The Prophet ﷺ asked: "To whom?"

"To a woman from the Anṣār."

"What did you give her as Mahr?"

"A weight in gold equivalent to the pit of a date."

A date pit weighs less than a gram. It was an extremely modest Mahr, perhaps the equivalent of a few dollars in modern terms. ʿAbdur-Raḥmān had managed to save just enough, through his trading, to give a minimal Mahr and begin a family.

The Prophet ﷺ said: "Awlim wa law bi-shāh", "Do a Walīmah (wedding feast), even if it's just one sheep." Invite the people, celebrate this marriage, make it known.

This story is one of the most celebrated in the Seerah because it captures a dual excellence: the generosity of the Anṣār that has no ceiling, and the karāmah (dignity) of the Muhājirūn that has no floor. Each side expressing Imān in its own way, one by giving without limit, the other by refusing to receive what they did not earn.

ʿAbdur-Raḥmān ibn ʿAwf went on to become one of the wealthiest men in the Ummah, known for his massive charitable endowments. From a date-pit weight of gold Mahr, he would eventually die leaving behind estates of such size that historians debated their exact value.